


October, 1976

by Kattlupin



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Boys In Love, F/M, First Kiss, Getting Together, James is oblivious, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), jily, peter is observant, remus is introspective, sirius is spontaneous, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-17 00:57:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21257417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kattlupin/pseuds/Kattlupin
Summary: To everyone at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, October of 1976 was just your average month. Unless of course you were a member of a certain group of troublemakers known as the Marauders. For them, it was a month of mischief, quidditch and most of all falling in love.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 8
Kudos: 133





	October, 1976

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was born from a fictober prompt list on tumblr. Each days prompt is bold and italicized.

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**Remus - Friday October 1st, 1976**

** _“It will be fun, trust me.”_ ** How many times have I heard Sirius Black say just that? 

Sure, he’s right, it’s usually fun. It’s the trust part I struggle with. He doesn’t realize it, how could he, I’ve never told him, but there’s more at stake than just my physical wellbeing when I’m with him. I’d much prefer a broken arm or leg, over the inevitable broken heart I’m bound to be mending alone when the truth of how I feel for Sirius is accidentally revealed. 

“Ready Moony?” 

I look to my right and catch one final glimpse. He’s practically aglow with the promise of death defying excitement. Eyes are bright, his smile wide, his hair is whipping around in the wind that is blowing it out of the knot he’d wrapped it in with a black elastic. It’s no wonder I’m in love with him. Brilliant, wild and beautiful. Everything I am not. 

“Ready,” I say. 

He grabs my hand and my heart stops. This was not part of the plan. But it’s my favorite part, as we jump from the Astronomy Tower. 

His hand warm against mine, our fingers interwoven, holding on in a strong grip. If James and Peter’s cushioning charms don’t work, then I’ll die a happy man at the bottom. 

_____

**Peter - Saturday October 2nd, 1976**

** _“Just follow me, I know the area,” _ **I say. Thankfully we’re in a dark enough place that Sirius doesn’t catch the glare I’m giving him. If it was Remus or James he was with, he wouldn’t question our whereabouts at all. But because it’s me, he has to second guess everything. I wonder if he realizes he does that?

Remus doesn’t do it. Though it’s probably because Remus is usually second guessing himself. And James doesn’t do it. Probably because James couldn’t care less about the outcome of anything. It’s all an adventure to him anyways. 

But Sirius, Sirius always questions my every move. It’s quite irritating really. I’m plenty capable, I know the lay out of this castle better than all of them at this point. Turns out, being a rat can come in handy when you’re trying to map out a place as vast and complex as Hogwarts. Which is what we’re doing today. Trying to transcribe the secret passageway that connects the statue of the one eyed witch to Honeyduke’s onto our masterpiece, the Marauders Map. 

“I just want to know that this works before the full moon next week,” Sirius says. And I can’t miss the note of urgency behind his voice. I wonder how long it’s going to take before him and Remus realize they’re in love with each other? 

_____

**Sirius - Sunday October 3rd, 1976**

** _“Now? Now you listen to me?” _ **I say to James.

“Yes Padfoot, now I listen to you.”

“I was joking,” I smack him upside the head, messing up his already messy hair. Not that it matters, Lily is going to hex his bollocks off when she experiences what he’s done. 

“So? It was still a good idea!”

“James! It was a terrible idea!” 

“Well it’s too late, I’ve already set the charms. It’s happening regardless when she enters the Great Hall.” 

“You’re such an idiot Prongs.” I roll my eyes at him and rest my chin on my arms on the table. I watch James take a sip of his tea, smug bastard looks supremely confident for someone who’s about to have Lily Evans’s wand pointed at him. 

“You’ll see, this is what wins her over.” 

I turn my head to rest my cheek on my arms, allowing myself a full view of the spectacle that’s about to dominate the Great Hall. There’s a flash of red hair hurrying down the stairs and through the doors when, BOOM, it happens. 

With a loud bang, Lily is thrown through the air like a quaffle signaling the start of a quidditch match. And James, ever the star chaser is scooping her up before she hits the ground. 

“What the fuck Potter?!” she yells when she lands in his arms with a thud. 

“Come to Hogsmeade with me next weekend.” 

The poor sod. He actually looks hopeful. 

“After that? No!” She pushes herself out of his arms and draws her wand, pointing it low. “_ Redactum _!”

“My balls!” James screeches out, his hands frantically cupping the front of his pants. It’s fine, they’ll grow back to normal size in an hour or two. It’s not as if she hasn’t hit him with that hex before. 

I’m cackling as I watch Lily storm away from James and back out the Great Hall where she pushes past Remus who’s laughing uproariously at James’s misfortune. Merlin and Morgana, seeing Remus laugh like this, was worth the whole sodding idea.

_____  


**James - Monday October 4th, 1976**

** _“I know you didn’t ask for this.” _ **I say to Peter, slipping an arm around his shoulders as we walk back to the common room. He looks at me with suspicion and rightfully so. “But Sirius has detention and Remus is off doing Remus things..”

“I believe you mean studying,” Peter says. 

“Well, yes that. But more specifically studying with Lily.” 

“You know he’s not interested in her right?”

“How can he not be? She’s the fittest girl in all of Hogwarts.”

“Did you miss the whole Remus is into blokes talk we had at the beginning of last year?”

“Well, no. But it’s not as if Remus has even dated a bloke since then.”

“He doesn’t have to date a bloke for it to be true, you git.” Peter says as he ducks out from under my arm and smacks me upside the head. 

Why does that keep happening, I wonder. All my friends must think I’m a moron lately. But a moron in love. Oh god, don’t say that out loud James.

“Just because you think Lily is the most beautiful person in the world, that doesn’t mean that everyone agrees with you.”

“Fine, Remus isn’t into Lily,” I concede. Afterall Peter does have a point. But I wonder who Remus is interested in? There has to be someone. Maybe that Ravenclaw Prefect he’s always doing rounds with. That has to be who it is. Huh, maybe I should be a prefect, then I could do rounds with Lily.

“So can we please skip this whole, Peter you go rat and scare Lily into my arms plan? I don’t want to get hit with a book.”

“No. We’re still doing it.” She’s bound to say yes to me eventually. 

_____  


**Remus - Tuesday October 5th, 1976**

** _“I might just kiss you.” _ **

“What?” I respond back. I must be dreaming. There is no way Sirius Black told me he might just kiss me. 

“I said, I might just kiss you.”

My mouth has suddenly gone dry. Which is a shame, because if indeed, he really is going to kiss me, I don’t want to have a dry mouth at the time. But it’s not like he’s going to kiss me. Sirius isn’t like that. Isn’t like me. Into blokes or more importantly, hopelessly in love with his best friend. I roll my eyes at him. “Don’t be a tease, Padfoot.”

“You think I won’t kiss you?”

My breath catches in my throat as he leans in with one of his eyebrows raised, practically begging me to meet him halfway. And I almost do, but I know he doesn’t mean it. He’s just teasing. Sirius isn’t gay, nor is he into me. I wonder who he is into these days. It’s been ages since I’ve seen him with any of the girls. 

“Here,” I say as I hand him my History of Magic notes instead. They are, after all, what he had wanted in the first place. I’m not sure, but I think he looks a bit disappointed when he takes them from my hand.

_____  


**Sirius - Wednesday October 6th, 1976**

** _“Yes, I’m aware. Your point?”_ ** James says rather arrogantly. 

“I just don’t think the night before the full moon is the best time for us to pull this prank.” I get it, he’s burned because Lily didn’t run into his arms the other day at the sight of Peter in rat form, but instead threw her Transfiguration textbook at poor Peter, which is why Peter isn’t talking to him. And the partnering in Potions today didn’t help his mood, but still, it isn’t worth risking. 

“Since when does that matter to you?”

“It’s always mattered to me,” I say. And it has. Even if he says he doesn’t, Remus needs us for full moons. More so now that we have become animagi. “I’m not going to risk a detention and not being able to join Moony tomorrow, all because you want to blow off some steam by lighting filibuster fireworks in the Slytherin common room.”

“But your brother will be in there.” James’s tone is mocking. 

“Fuck off, Prongs,” I say with finality as I walk away. That’s a low blow and James knows it. Even if I’ve been disowned by my parents, that doesn’t mean I don’t love Regulus. Sure, we might not talk much anymore, but I don’t want to hurt him. And I definitely don’t want to hurt him because James is mad that Lily was partnered with Snape in Potions. She didn’t even want to work with him. It was evident on her face. I got to work with Remus though.

I wonder where Remus is? Probably studying when he should be resting. I think I’ll go find him.

____  
  


**Peter - Thursday October 7th, 1976**

** _“No, and that’s final,” _ **Remus’s words are firm. There's a bit of thunder rumbling in the background. 

“It’s just a little rain Moony,” James says. 

“Exactly, and the wolf doesn’t like storms,” Remus argues back. 

I sigh. Here we go again, the monthly debate. Remus is going to argue that it’s not safe to take him outside. Sirius is going to argue back that once a wolf, he’s happier in the Forbidden Forest, even in a storm. And James is going to counter that _ he’s _ too big with his antlers to stay in the shack. Which is going to make Remus feel guilty. Leading to the inevitable question.

“Hey Pete, don’t you agree we should go out tonight after Moony transforms?” James asks. It’s always James. Remus wouldn’t dare ask and risk upsetting anyone. And Sirius won’t ask, and risk upsetting Remus. So instead, they pitch the quaffle to me. And as a rat, my personal opinion is I’d rather stay inside. It’s safer and dryer in here, even when we’re locked away with an almost fully grown werewolf.

“I don’t know,” I say after a moment of thought, trying to buy myself some time as I carefully read the room. James looks confident, Sirius looks nervous and Remus looks like he’s going to be sick. Which in a way, I guess he is. And in all honesty, didn’t we go through all the trouble to become animagi to help Remus? This should be about what he wants. Finally I answer, “I think we should stay in.”

_____  


**Sirius - Friday October 8th,1976**

** _“Can you stay?” _ **I replay his words in my mind as I lay here with him. He’s asleep, finally, but shivering still. I don’t think he realized what he was asking, or more importantly, how he was asking it. His “can you stay” wasn’t directed at all of us. It was aimed at just me, and I have never been able to refuse Remus when he’s like this. 

Last night had been bad. We should have listened to him. Hell, Peter did, yet we didn’t listen to him either. James was restless and cramped and I wanted to run, tackle and chase after Moony. Peter was happy to cower in the chewed up bench seat for the piano. Remus was relatively fine on the rug. We should’ve stayed in. I could have curled up against the wolf all night, stayed close and warm. That alone would have kept him calm. Which isn’t that the goal when I chase after him anyway? To be near him, but not in such an obvious way, I guess. 

With James and Peter gone, and Remus in such a vulnerable state, I can let my guard down. He asked me to stay. Not James, not Peter, but me. If he wanted me to stay, surely he won’t mind if I wrap my arms around him. He looks so cold here. His hair still wet, his clothes still discarded from before he transformed, this ruddy old musty blanket on this aging mattress are nowhere near enough to keep him warm. 

He shivers again in his sleep. I check the clock. Two more hours till Madam Pomfrey will arrive. I slide further down under the blankets and let myself hold him from behind. He sighs in his sleep, in my arms. Within the privacy that the shack provides us, I hold him tighter to me. 

_____  


**James - Saturday October 9th, 1976**

** _“There is a certain taste to it,” _ **I say to the two grimacing faces before me. I pop another cockroach cluster into my mouth, purposely crunching on it with an open mouth to disgust Sirius and Peter more than they already are. Truthfully, these things aren’t bad, a bit salty perhaps, but the chocolate and caramel hide it well. 

“You’re disgusting Prongs,” Sirius says, looking over a box of chocolates that he keeps picking up and putting down. I don’t know why he’s hesitating. My parents gave him the same amount of pocket money that they gave me. He puts it down again. 

“Are you getting anything Wormtail?” I ask Peter. He’s counting his sickles in his hand. 

“Nah, not if we’re going to The Three Broomsticks after this.” 

“I’m buying lunch for us today,” I say on impulse. That hadn’t been my plan. My plan was to have lunch with Lily. But it’ll feel good to treat my friends instead. Too bad Remus is still in the hospital wing. I had to beg Sirius to leave him and join us. 

“Really?” Peter asks. He looks genuinely excited and I nod at him. “I guess I’ll get a few triple fudge bars then.”

I grab some for myself as well, along with the bag of cockroach clusters. I’m really only buying them to freak people out, even if they don’t taste that bad. 

“Do you think Remus would like these?” Sirius asks me at the counter. He’s holding that same box of chocolates again. 

_____  


**Remus - Sunday October 10th, 1976**

** _“Listen, I can’t explain it. You’ll have to trust me.” _ **

There it is again, that demand of trust from Sirius Black. Little does he know I’d willingly follow him anywhere. Just like I am now as we wander through this darkened tunnel after descending down a passageway that opened up in the hump of that statue of Gunhilda of Gorsemoor. 

I’d asked him why the air smelled like chocolate. He’s lying about not being able to explain. But I’m also playing dumb like I don’t know this tunnel ends at Honeyduke’s, so which one of us is worse? He just looked so excited to take me down here after I was released from Madam Pomfrey’s care, I didn’t want to break it to him that I could tell by the smell and the direction we were headed that I knew where we were going. 

“We’re getting close,” he says and then he grabs my hand. 

I feel my cheeks flush upon contact, thank Godric it’s dark down here. I let my thumb brush over his knuckles as we continue. He stops and pushes a trapdoor open with his free hand. The tunnel is flooded with light and the smell of rich dark chocolate. He pulls me forward and into the light, then let’s go of my hand to pull himself up. I instantly miss the contact. Luckily it doesn’t last long and I’m given both of his hands this time. I grab ahold and he pulls me up. Once standing, he only releases his left hand, he continues to hold me firmly in his right. 

“Honeyduke’s,” he whispers slyly. “Now we can replenish your chocolate supply whenever you like.”

The way he smiles when he says it, all bright and kind and a bit mischievous. I’m glad I didn’t let on that I knew where we were going. 

_____

**Sirius - Monday October 11th, 1976**

** _“It’s not always like this.” _ **James says to me. 

“It’s not always like what James?” I ask, reluctantly taking the bait, though I know where this is going. He’s about to give me his usual Lily focused soliloquy over my breakfast.

“What I feel for Lily, it’s more than just a crush, you know? More than what you’ve ever felt for any of the birds you carry on with. When I finally win Lily over, I want it to be forever.”

I fix him with my best glare. What is he on about? Is this some sort of dig at me? So what if none of my encounters with the girls has lasted longer than a few dates to Hogsmeade or hidden trysts in broom cupboards. It’s perfectly normal not to have that much interest in them right? And why does James think what he feels for Lily is so much more fucking intense. He’s never even kissed her. And I know from experience that it’s never what you want it to be. 

“What’s that look for?” he asks, noticing my glare.

“Nothing. It’s just…” I try to collect my thoughts. Why is this bothering me anyway? It’s not like there’s even any girls I’m interested in right now. Truth be told, I keep thinking about holding Remus while he sleeps again. I’ve never thought about holding any of the girls like that before. What is it about Remus that’s different? Besides the fact that he’s a bloke. “I take offense to you assuming that what you feel for Lily is more than I’ve ever felt for anyone.”

“Really? When has Sirius Black ever been in love with anything other than his own reflection?”

“You know Prongs, you can really be a prick sometimes.”

“What?” He throws his hands up in mock defense.

And people tell me I need to think more before I speak. I roll my eyes at him and sip my tea as I mull over his words. In a way, he’s not wrong. I’ve never really been that hung up on any of the girls I’ve been with. For the most part, they’d always seemed like more trouble than what they were worth. 

“Morning Gentlemen.” Remus’s voice breaks me from my thoughts. 

He takes his usual seat beside me and I can’t tell which one of us scoots closer to the other. I let my thigh press against his. It’s not the same as being in the shack, but it’s close enough to get me through breakfast. Maybe I love Remus? A smile tugs at my lips.

_____  


**Peter - Tuesday October 12th, 1976**

** _“What if I don’t see it?” _ **James says. And even though he poses it as a question, it’s actually his way of telling me that I’m wrong. 

I really can’t believe James is this thick. No, that’s a lie. I can believe that James “there’s no way Lupin is a werewolf” Potter is this dense. I mean hell, a few days ago he was convinced that Remus was trying to get with Lily. I shouldn’t be surprised that he’s this taken aback at the idea that Remus and Sirius are in love with each other. 

I didn’t even want to have this conversation, but James is so distraught over Sirius’s reaction to his accusations against Sirius’s character at breakfast yesterday, that here we are, with James asking me what girl it is that we need to help Sirius woo. Not that Sirius needs any help with that. Even with his reputation as a lothario, he’s still sought after by most of the girls in school. I just shake my head at him.

“Oh come on Wormtail, you can’t tell me that you actually think that? For one...” he starts counting on his fingers, “Sirius is very much into girls, just ask any of them. And two, Remus is seeing that swotty Ravenclaw prefect…”

“No James,” I interrupt. “Remus isn’t seeing anybody.”

“Sure he is, he just hasn’t told us.”

I let out a breath. “Do you honestly believe that Remus wouldn’t tell us if he was seeing someone?”

“Absolutely! He hid he was a werewolf for more than an entire year from us.”

“Yes, poorly and because he had too,” I try to reason. “You know for such a smart guy James, you really are pretty thick.”

“Oh, and you’re one to talk. You’d have failed Potions and History of Magic by now if it wasn’t for our help.”

“And you’re also a prick, you know that?”

“Why does everybody keep saying that?” James laughs, because really, it’s all a joke to him. And if he ever wants Lily to take him seriously he might want to tone that down.

“Because you are! And for the record, all of us would’ve failed History of Magic by now if it wasn’t for Remus.”

“Ok, that’s true. But you’re wrong about Remus and Sirius. That I’m sure of.”

“If you say so,” I sigh. Then I wonder how it is that I’m the only one who’s aware of anything around here.

_____  


**Remus - Wednesday October 13th, 1976**

** _“I never knew it could be this way,” _ **I whisper to Lily across the library table. It’s the best place for us to have these chats, though I’m beginning to think that James is convinced I’m trying to get with her. Poor sod. So blinded by his love he not only misses that I’m in love with Sirius, but also seems to forget that I’m gay.

It’s funny really, I’d been so worried about what all of them would say when I told them, that it’s a bit of a relief that it’s not even a second thought to any of them. Same as it was when they found out I was a werewolf. Everything just went on, business and pranks as usual.

“Never knew what could be this way?” she asks, putting her quill down and looking over our Arithmancy work at me.

“Being in love. It’s both easy and complicated.”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself Remus, you haven’t even told him yet.”

“Nor will I ever,” I scoff. That’s the easy and complicated part. He’s so easy to love, making it so complicated to contain and hide. And a part of me thinks that Peter suspects how I feel about Sirius.

“What’s the worst that could happen if you did tell him?” Lily gives me a quizzically crooked smile, one red eyebrow raised.

“He could punch me and never speak to me again. Besides, you forget, Sirius, the Gryffindor ladies man, is into ladies.”

“Is he though?”

I give Lily my coldest stare.

“No, really Remus. Think about it. He hasn’t dated anybody at all this term.”

“That doesn’t mean anything Lily.”

“It doesn’t? Because I think it does. And don’t forget Remus, each of my dorm mates has dated him. And do you know what Marlene, Mary and Alice have all said?”

“What?”

“They’ve all said he spent the majority of their time together talking about you. I’m just saying, I don’t think it’s as hopeless as you think.” She picks up her quill again and goes back to her notes.

“Doubtful,” I say as I pick up my own quill. But I’m too lost in thought to continue to work. I wonder if he really talked about me that much? And there was that moment at breakfast the other day, I felt him press his thigh against mine. And then the morning after the full moon in the shack, he stayed. Not only did he stay, but I woke up in his arms. It was the best morning of my life.

_____   


**James - Thursday October 14th, 1976**

** _“I can’t come back.” _ **I hear Sirius say to Regulus from my hiding spot underneath the invisibility cloak, and now I think I know why he didn’t want me to come. 

There’s a lot of feelings going on over there, and feelings outside of Lily really aren’t my thing. I only have so much space, you know? Godric, who am I talking to? Myself I guess. I shake my head to clear my thoughts and feel the silky fabric of the cloak shimmy around me. 

“But you can come back,” Regulus argues. His face is as stoic as ever, but his voice gives him away. I wonder when the last time was they spoke? Have they been meeting like this all term?

“I’m sorry, Reg. I really can’t. Even if mum and dad wanted me, I don’t want them anymore.”

“So you’re choosing this bit of half blood trash over family.” Regulus flippantly gestures to Remus who’s standing beside Sirius. “Over me?” 

“It’s not like that Regulus,” Remus says.

I continue to watch the exchange, hidden underneath the cloak, but I’m no longer listening. Even though Remus is a better man for this sort of encounter, I am a bit put off that Sirius wanted Remus to go with him instead of me. I’m his brother in everything but blood, at least that’s what he’s always told me. So why does Remus get to join him to see his real brother? Maybe there is something to what Peter was going on about. Sirius has been abnormally close to Remus lately. Leaning on him in ways he’s never leaned on me.

Ever since he ran away, it seems as if he’s relying more on Remus. Which I don’t get. He ran to my house, not the Lupin’s. Doesn’t that give me some sort of claim to him. Wait, that’s not right. Sirius isn’t something to be claimed. But that doesn’t change that I am a bit put out that he’s chosen Remus over me again. 

_____  


**Peter - Friday October 15th, 1976**

** _“That’s what I’m talking about.” _ **I say to James. But it’s more like, that’s what I’ve been saying for days now. Though Godric knows that James has always struggled with listening. 

James pushes open the doors leading out onto the grounds, to go meet Sirius and Remus under the beech tree by the lake. “It’s the only answer I can come up with as to why Sirius would take Remus with him to talk to Regulus instead of me.” 

So that’s what it took, I think. James can only rectify the fact that Sirius chose Remus over him if he’s trying to get with him. Not that Remus is the most likely candidate for such confrontations. I know I’d take Remus with me over James if I was in the same situation. 

“I mean, it’s fine. If that’s what’s going on between them.” James shrugs his shoulders and flips his hands up while we walk, Sirius and Remus are coming more clearly into view. “I just wish that they would tell us.”

“I’m not sure that there is anything for them to tell us yet, James. I honestly don’t think they realize that they both feel the same way.” I look over at James and then point towards our friends under the tree. Sirius is lounging against the trunk, looking both aristocratic and indifferent, while his wand swirls out smoke in the shape of a wolf and a dog, like imitations of their potential patronus’s. Remus is watching him, looking over his book, a bit shy and a bit mesmerized at the display of Sirius’s magic. Their legs are touching in a way the space dictates unnecessary. There’s no reason for them to be as close as they are right now.

“Hey you poof’s,” James says in a joking tone as we arrive. Why does he always go too far?

“You know James, you can really be a prick sometimes!” Remus says, looking affronted and rising from the ground. James has never said something so blatanly insensitive to Remus regarding the fact that he’s gay before, even if he’s just joking. Remus turns and walks back towards the castle. Sirius scrambles to his feet and chases after him. 

“What?” James asks me, and all I can do is shake my head at him.

_____  


**Remus - Saturday October 16th, 1976**

** _“Listen. No, really listen.” _ **James is trying to apologize in the only way he knows how, by talking at you. “I was just trying to be supportive.”

“It’s fine James,” I concede. There really is no point in arguing with him. I know deep down he didn’t mean anything by it. And if push comes to shove, I know he’ll always support me. He always has. Thinking back, I was just as upset with him when he referred to me being a werewolf as my “furry little problem”. Though I doubt I’ll be all that happy if he calls me a poof again. “Just please don’t do it again James.”

“Okay,” he says happily and claps me a little too hard on the shoulder. “So, you like him, huh?”

His question catches me off guard. I don’t know what to say. 

“I mean, I’m fine with it,” he supplies. “A bit surprised is all. I thought you were seeing that Ravenclaw prefect.”

“Why would you think that?” I can’t help but laugh.

“Well, you just spend a lot of time with him, and he seems like your type.” James gives me his signature shrug, palms turned up, an earnest look on his face and I’m reminded why I love being his friend again. For how smart he is, he really is just this dumb sometimes, it’s endearing.

“It’s called rounds you moron.” I smack him upside the head and at this point I’m surprised there isn’t a handprint shaped lump back there for how often all of us seem to have to do this. “I also do them with Lily, I suppose you think I’m seeing her as well.”

“The thought had crossed my mind.”

Laughing, I make to hit him again, but this time he has the foresight to realize it’s coming and his hand stops me before I can make contact. “You’re such an idiot prongs.”

“I mean, you’re a handsome bloke, I think it’s possible that the entire entourage of prefects could be after you.”

“Are you hitting on me James?”

“No, you’re not my type Moony. I only have eyes for redheads, you know that.”

“So it’s the Prewitt twins you have your eyes on then?” I tease. It’s really the only language that James speaks fluently. 

“Nah, just Lily,” he says a bit sadly. “You don’t think she thinks I’m a prick too, do you?”

“Honestly, yes. But perhaps we can work together on this.”

“And perhaps I can help you with Sirius.”

“There’s nothing for you to help me with James. Sirius isn’t into me like that. He’s not even into blokes.”

“You guys have been telling me that about Lily for years. The not into me part, not the not into blokes part. But that hasn’t stopped me from trying.”

“And how’s that worked out for you?”

“I guess I’m enjoying the chase.” He shrugs again and tosses a snitch into the air, then immediately catches it. 

If only this matter of love was so simple.

_____  


**Sirius - Sunday October 17th, 1976**

** _“There is just something about him.” _ **

I can’t believe what I just heard. Did Lily just say that there is something about James? He’s going to be thrilled. I never thought I’d see the day. 

“There is just something about him that is so fucking irritating. Like the other morning flipping me into the air at breakfast.” Nope, that’s more accurate. Lily still hates James. “Or a couple days later, letting that god awful rat of his loose in my direction.”

I laugh at the crack about the rat. If she only knew. “You do have to give him some credit for his persistence though.”

“Do I?” she asks. 

“I mean, he’s been at it since first year. At least you know he’s loyal.”

“Yeah, but does he only like the chase?”

“James isn’t that creative Lily,” I tell her, and that’s truthful. If James ever does get a chance with Lily he’s most certainly not going to throw it away because he’s bored. He’ll honestly be insufferable with how ecstatic he is at the fact that she finally said yes.

“And what about you?”

“What about me?”

“What’s your deal with Remus?” She raises one of her red eyebrows at me, a half smile tugging at the right side of her face. 

So this is what this was all about. She didn’t want to work on our Ancient Runes project, she wanted to dig into my feelings for Remus. And truth be told, I’m not ready to dig into them myself. I’m not even sure what they are. I’ve never felt anything like this before. And I’m a little frightened to find out I’m not hiding it well. How did this redhead figure me out? 

I look at her and raise one of my own eyebrows. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Evans.”

“To hell you don’t Black. I’m not blind. Just promise me you won’t hurt him.”

I drop my gaze. Hurting Remus is the last thing I’d ever want to do. “I would never.” 

_____  


**Remus - Monday October 18th, 1976**

** _“Secrets? I love secrets.” _ **At least that’s what I tell myself as lie awake, hidden within the curtains of my four poster bed, vowing to never reveal how heartbroken I am about Sirius Black. I let out a sigh, conceding to another sleepless night. 

Sirius came back from working on his Ancient Runes project with Lily in a bit of a huff. I looked up from my spot in the chair by the fire at his arrival. There had been a brief glance shared between us, and for a moment, I thought maybe Lily was right. Maybe he did return my feelings. But then he ran off and up the stairs to the dorms, a look of what can only be described as horror on his face. Which led to my next conclusion, Lily told him how I feel and now he hates me. I can’t believe Lily would do that to me. 

After Sirius stormed off, I went on my prefect rounds, which I was thankful for, if only for the fact that they provided me with an excuse to avoid Sirius and our dorm room. Even once I returned to Gryffindor Tower, I stayed in the common room, waiting for it to be late enough to ensure everyone else was asleep. 

I roll over and sigh again. I’m not surprised really. I knew he could never feel the same. It’s been a ridiculous crush from the beginning. 

Except it’s not a crush. I love him. 

“Remus,” Sirius’s voice outside my curtains breaks me from my thoughts of him. He sounds soft and gentle, not harsh and angry. 

“You can come in Sirius.” I shift myself to sit against the headboard. Sirius pulls the curtains apart enough to enter and sits on the bed beside me. His thigh presses against mine and I try to remind myself that it’s because we’re sharing a narrow bed and not because he wants to touch me. 

“I’m sorry about earlier,” he says, his head dropped, his hands playing with the hem of my blanket. “Running off like that. It wasn’t what it looked like.”

“It’s okay even if it was, Sirius.”

“But it wasn’t.” He lets go of the blanket and grabs my hand instead. His strong fingers, slightly calloused yet impossibly smooth wrap around mine in a firm grip. It’s just like they’d done when we jumped from the Astronomy Tower days ago. “I just wasn’t ready yet.” 

“Ready for what?” I ask. 

“Ready for this.” He reaches his free hand across us and guides me by my chin to look at him. With his eyes bright, his cheeks flushed and his lips slightly parted, he kisses me. 

I melt into him, moaning quietly into his lips, increasing the vibrations that are strumming between us. He lets go of my hand and shifts us to lie down, pulling us closer together. It’s more than I had ever dreamed possible. 

“Can I stay?” He asks, his lips still hovering over mine. 

And for once I don’t use my words to answer, but let my lips do the talking just the same. 

_____  


**Sirius - Tuesday October 19th, 1976**

** _“Yes, I admit it. You were right.”_ ** Remus says, his breath brushing against the shell of my ear. “This was a far better idea than going to History of Magic.”

“Hmmmmmm,” I agree, moaning softly while his lips begin to press light kisses against the sensitive skin of my neck. My pulse growing stronger and faster with each press of his lips. I tilt my chin back allowing him better access.

“What are we going to tell James and Peter when they ask where we were?”

I bring my hands to cup his cheeks and guide him to look me in the eyes. “We can tell them whatever it is you’d like.”

We’d briefly talked about this last night, before we had both fallen asleep, my arms wrapped around him, holding his back close against my chest. It’s even better than I remember it being in the shrieking shack. Sleeping beside him feels as if I have always been meant to be there. Having him warm against me, it’s the most content I have ever felt. 

When I woke up this morning to sneak back into my own bed before either James or Peter could catch us, I felt a bit empty. As if a piece of me had been pulled away, and if I thought about him hard enough, I could almost feel the ghost of his presence still there. Missing him, while he was only a few meters away, was the strangest feeling I have ever had, and one I do not wish to repeat often. Hence why we are in this broom cupboard instead of Professor Binn’s classroom.

“I don’t know if I’m ready for them to know,” Remus says a bit shyly, his eyes closing, lashes falling atop his flushed cheeks. “Not until we know what this is.”

I brush my thumbs over his cheek bones, his skin warm beneath the calloused pads. “I know what this is to me, Moony.”

“Oh yeah, what’s that?” Remus opens his eyes again and looks up at me. His expression soft and vulnerable. 

“Everything.” 

_____

**Peter - Wednesday October 20th, 1976**

** _“You could talk about it, you know?” _ **I say to Remus. 

“What was that?” he asks, barely turning to look at me. He’s straining to keep an eye on Sirius soaring through the air on his broomstick, his beaters bat held aloft and at the ready to send any bludgers that come his way across the quidditch pitch. 

“You could talk about it,” I say again. “You know, whatever it is that’s going on between you and Sirius.”

This time he does look directly at me, the color draining from his face. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Sure you don’t Moony.” I playfully shove him slightly, then point towards Sirius in the sky. Sirius, who just happens to be staring directly at Remus instead of paying attention to where he’s flying. Marlene has to swerve to avoid hitting him. Remus lets out a little gasp. “I mean, you coming to watch quidditch practice is a totally normal thing that you do.” 

“Oh shut up,” Remus scolds without malice, the color is creeping back into his face, making his cheeks glow with a pinkish hue. 

“But you could talk about,” I say again. “I know the two of you fancy each other.”

“How?” Remus asks. “I’ve never mentioned it to anyone other than Lily.”

“You don’t have to Moony. I can see it on your face, and his honestly.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Really. Neither of you is very subtle.”

Remus lets out a gasp again. 

I look to see Sirius narrowly avoiding getting hit by a bludger. James comes zooming towards him, his face flush with anger as he yells. “For fuck sake Padfoot! Stop flirting and pay attention.” 

“Do you think James will be upset?” Remus asks. 

“About you and Sirius, nah. He might be a bit thick sometimes, but he really does just want all of us to be happy.” 

Remus looks at me and smiles kindly. “You know Peter, you’re way more observant than anyone gives you credit for.”

_____

**James - Thursday October 21st, 1976**

** _“Change is annoyingly difficult,” _ **I say to the team. I’m standing before them, a chalkboard magically hovering behind me with some names and a game plan drawn up for our match against Hufflepuff on Saturday. “But since Sirius decided he’d rather flirt than pay attention, we’re stuck having to bring in a new chaser to replace Marlene.”

“I wasn’t flirting!”

“Sure you weren’t.” I point back to the board, specifically towards the list of names. Truth be told, I’m actually not that mad at Sirius. If all goes well, and the team agrees, Lily will be joining us as our back up chaser. She’s good. Not Marlene good, but good. “I think we should use...”

“Lily Evans.” The whole team interrupts and answers in unison. Sirius is smirking at me.

“Well yes, she is the best choice,” I say. “And she’s already agreed.”

“Great. So why are we here? Before sunrise.” Frank Longbottom, our keeper asks.

“Team meeting, formalities, and a reminder that quidditch is more important than flirting.”

“Pffft,” Sirius huffs. “Lets see you hold true to that with Evans on the team.”

“Are you doubting my dedication to quidditch, Padfoot?”

“I’m doubting your ability to not flirt incessantly with Lily.”

“Says the one who couldn’t stop flirting with Remus to properly practice yesterday.”

“Wait, what?” Dorcas, our seeker says, turning her head in a comically exaggerated half circle to look at Sirius.

Oh Godric, I think. This is exactly why everyone has been telling me I’m a prick lately. I may have just outed my two best friends. Well Sirius at least, most everyone already knows about Remus. There’s a knock on the door and then Lily enters.

“So what have I missed?” Lily asks, looking heavenly in her fresh kit.

“Nothing. Just James behaving like a prick.” Sirius grabs his broomstick and storms out the door leading to the pitch.

I shrug my shoulders and smile sheepishly at Lily. Godric, she is beautiful. 

_____

**Remus - Friday October 22nd, 1976**

** _“We could have a chance,” _ **Sirius breathes out against my mouth. His hands are under my shirt, his palms cool against my overly warm skin. He presses himself closer to me. “If we make a real go of this.” 

“Really?” I say, tipping my head back, fully exposing my neck. Sirius dives in, pressing nips, licks and sucks into the sensitive skin. “Mr. Sirius Black wants to give this a real go.”

He suddenly pulls his lips away, his eyes flashing from hooded and lust filled to wide and concerned. “Do you not want that?”

“What this?” I ask. 

“Yes this. But more to the point, us together.” I can feel his palms growing wider over my back, fingertips digging into my skin, pulling me flush against him. 

“Oh course I want that Sirius. It’s all I’ve ever wanted.” I stretch my neck to kiss him, he pulls away after a quick peck. 

“I just…” he pauses and fixes me with a look that burns right through to my soul. “I want to do this right. I want to really be with you. Not just for snogging and sex…”

“We’re not there yet Padfoot. Not that I don’t want that.”

“I want that too, of course, but I just want to be with you completely. I want to do everything right with you, from the start.”

I close my eyes and take in a breath. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted to hear, experience, feel from Sirius. I’ve loved him for so long and in a few sentences he’s made that love more tangible. I reopen my eyes, he’s still looking at me, head slightly tilted down to catch my eyeline. 

“I think I love you,” he says, voice the softest it’s ever been. Softer even than after a full moon. 

“I think I love you too.” He kisses me deeply, urgently, yet ever so gently. 

_____  


**James - Saturday October 23rd, 1976**

** _“You can’t give more than yourself,” _ **Lily says a bit teasingly. 

At least I think she’s teasing. I hope she’s teasing. No one’s ever talked back to me during my day before a quidditch match pep talk. Not even Sirius. Sirius who looks bored and restless, like he has somewhere else he’d rather be right now. What is with him lately?

“She’s right you know, Potter. We can’t give more than ourselves. What more can you want from us?” Dorcas asks. Her and Lily are sitting beside one another, nodding in agreement. 

“What I mean is, for you to give it your all when we lift off from the pitch tomorrow against Hufflepuff.” 

“Then just say that,” Lily says, her eyes rolling into the back of her head. 

“Ok,” I say, a bit flustered. Having Lily on the team was supposed to be my chance to impress her and apparently I’m failing. Why is Lily the only thing I fail at? I try again. “So when we uh… hit the pitch tomorrow… Let’s give it all we’ve got!”

“Much better,” Lily says, and I think she gives me a wink. I’m not sure. It could have been a blink. But it definitely wasn’t another eye roll. 

“Are we done?” Sirius asks.

“Umm… yeah… I guess so…” I scratch behind my ear. Why is everyone making me feel so wrong lately? 

“Good.” Sirius is up and out of the locker room before I can say anything else. Where is he going?

I watch in a bit of stunned silence as everyone else follows behind him. Everyone except for Lily, she waves Dorcas to go without her. She probably wants to make me feel like more of an arse than I already do.

“Sorry about that,” she says, her eyebrows gently furrowed together, the left side of her lips twisted up into a half smile. She looks a bit guilty. “I shouldn’t have challenged you. It’s your team.”

“Oh,” I say brightly and I ruffle my hair, a nervous twitch I can’t stop when I’m around her. “It’s okay. You made a good point.”

She pulls my hand away from my hair and laughs. “Stop that, you’ll be bald before you’re thirty.”

“Sorry,” I wince a little. I think this is the first time she’s actually initiated touch with me.

“I’ve never seen you like this Potter.”

“Like what?”

“Nervous.” She lets go of my hand. “It’s kind of cute actually.”

_____  


**Sirius - Sunday October 24th, 1976**

** _“Patience… is not something I’m known for,” _ **I yell to Dorcas over the wind and rain blowing around us. It’s cold up here on our broomsticks and this match has already gone on too long. “Catch the snitch!”

“I’m trying Black,” she yells back. “Quit distracting me!”

I swat at the bludger that zooms towards her, sending it to the other side of the pitch. James put me on Dorcas duty, as I like to call it. He wanted to ensure she had enough protection to be able to catch the snitch, but in this weather, it’s near impossible to even see the thing. And all I want to do is climb under the covers with Remus, be warm and calm. With him, I can finally let go enough to relax. 

I chance a quick glance at him in the stands. He’s sitting between Peter and a still healing Marlene. He’s wearing an oversized jumper, the cuffs of the sleeves long enough to cover his hands. His hair is smooshed down under a knit beanie. His neck is wrapped in my Gryffindor scarf, a secret fact between me and him. I casted an impervious charm on him before the match, ensuring that he’d at least stay dry. It appears to be working.

“Black!!!” James, Lily and Frank all yell in unison. Their voices ringing from three separate directions. 

I look up. There’s a bludger flying straight at me. I take it at full force into the chest, knocking me off of my broom and the wind out of me. 

As I fall from the sky, I hear two things simultaneously. The announcer proclaiming that Hufflepuff wins and Remus shouting my name over everything else.

_____

**Peter - Monday October 25th, 1976**

** _“I could really eat something,” _ **I say to James. He’s sitting on his bed looking dazed. 

“What?” He looks over at me, his face a bit vacant.

“I said, I could really eat something. Do you want to come to breakfast?”

He looks over to Sirius and Remus’s empty beds. Remus never came back from the hospital wing last night, he must have slept there.

“Sirius is going to be fine James.” 

And he will be. Sure, he fell from at least twenty meters up, but Remus was so quick with that _ Arresto Momentum _charm, that Sirius landed on the ground with a soft thud. It was the bludger to the chest that really messed him up. Four broken ribs and a cracked sternum. Nothing some Skele-gro and rest won’t fix, but the fall left everyone a bit shaken. James didn’t even care that Gryffindor lost. He hasn’t even mentioned that Lily was the one to comfort him while Sirius was being levitated off the pitch to Madam Pomfrey’s care.

“I know,” James says. “Maybe some food would do me some good.”

“Alright. Let's go.” I get up off my bed and throw the rest of my uniform on. James follows suit and we make our way out the door, down the stairs and through the common room out to the halls. We walk in relative silence, neither saying anything until we enter the Great Hall. 

“Where do think Remus is?” James asks as we sit down.

I look at him blankly. I can’t believe he really is this thick. Then before I can answer.

“Oh look, there’s Lily.” His hand goes straight to his hair.

_____

**Remus - Tuesday October 26th, 1976**

** _“You keep me warm.” _ **Sirius grabs me by the hand and pulls me into his bed. I yelp as my bum hits the mattress and try to scramble away, but his arms immediately wrap around me and pull my back against his chest. “Can you stay?”

We seem to be asking each other that question a lot lately. I check the clock, fifteen minutes until potions. I’m shit at potions, I should really go. But also, I’m shit at potions, so I think I’ll stay. He doesn’t have to go, Madam Pomfrey excused him from classes for the day, and let him return to the dorm because he was driving her crazy. 

“Hmmm,” I sigh. “It’s potions, I really should go.”

“No. Stay.” He holds me closer and places a kiss behind my ear. My whole body heats up. “I’ll tutor you.”

“But you’re missing today too.”

“Don’t care. Stay.” He kisses behind my ear again and I feel my entire body melt. “Stay with me Moony. Keep me warm.”

“Alright,” I relent. I kick my shoes off and let my legs intertwine around his. I grab ahold of one of his hands and kiss his wrist before holding it against my heart. I close my eyes and let out another sigh. And blissfully we fall asleep together.

_____  


**Sirius - Wednesday October 27th, 1976**

** _“Can you wait for me?” _ **I quietly ask Remus as we walk past each other, exchanging places in the shared bathroom of our dorm. It takes all of my will power not to attack him right now. He’s wearing just his pants and a skin tight white tee to cover his torso. His hair is still wet, and its dripping rivulets of water onto his shirt, making it cling to him more. Why had it taken me so long to realize just how beautiful he is?

“Of course,” he whispers back and his hand brushes mine, ever so slightly, but extremely deliberately. I want to grab it and pull him into the shower with me. Instead I close the door once he walks away.

We’d spent all day yesterday in my bed, the curtains closed to keep out any prying eyes. Not that there was anything for them to see, all we had done was slept, waking up occasionally to kiss. I decided yesterday that I could kiss him forever. And I think I just might.

If I think about it, I can still feel his lips against mine, or the soft swipe of his tongue, or the way he says Sirius like he’s summoning something wonderful from another world. And maybe that’s just what he was doing. He’s awakened something in me, that’s for sure. I feel high yet grounded to the earth. I feel warm all over. I feel safe and loved and seen. All because of Remus and the way he says my name, the way he tastes, the way he feels against me, and the way he holds me in his arms. 

He’s everything I never knew I wanted. Everything I never knew that was possible. And everything that I will hold dear to me for the rest of my life.

_____   


**James - Thursday October 28th, 1976**

**_“Enough! I heard enough.”_** I close the curtains around Sirius’s bed again. I should’ve known better than to look. But after years of hearing him moan through nightmares, I thought I was doing my duty as best friend by checking on him. How was I supposed to know these weren’t those kinds of moans. And truth be told, I shouldn’t be that surprised by what I found when I looked in there. Remus has been more attuned to Sirius’s nightmares for years. However, Remus has always managed to keep his shirt on when with him in the past. I guess that’s changed now. 

“James, we can explain.” Sirius practically brings the bed curtains down with him as he leaps out of the bed. Thankfully he’s still wearing his trousers, but like Remus, he’s also missing his shirt. 

“There’s no need to explain Sirius. I get it. You and Moony are a thing now. Knock yourselves out.” I throw my hands up in the air.

“Wait, are you pissed about this?” Sirius actually has the nerve to look offended.

“No,” I say. And I mean it, I’m not pissed. Just a bit put out I guess. “I just wish you would’ve told me. I’m your best friend.”

I slam the door behind me as I leave. I don’t know why I do it. I’m not really mad. I’m not even surprised, I mean Peter said he thought they liked each other, and they’ve both been acting so weird lately. But I am upset about something. I just don’t know what that is. 

“Potter,” Lily says as I enter the common room. 

I must really be upset, because the sight of Lily doesn’t lighten my mood. I sit beside her on the couch, dropping my head back against the cushion. 

“Alright, I’ll bite. What’s wrong?” she asks. 

“Nothing… just Sirius.” I run my hands through my hair. “And Remus.”

“Ahhhh,” she sighs, and places a gentle hand on my knee. “Feeling a bit left out?”

“No! I’m not…” I pause and look around then lower my voice. “Gay.”

“I know that, but your two best friends are in love, or close to it and you want that too. It’s normal to be a bit jealous James.” She pats me on the knee again, but I barely notice. My brain is still registering that she called me James. 

_____

**Peter - Friday October 29th, 1976**

** _“I’m doing this for you,” _ **I say to James. He’s been practically buzzing with excitement since he returned to the dorm last night. He woke us all, jumping on his bed and loudly proclaiming that Lily had finally warmed to him. Thankfully Remus told him to keep his voice down, otherwise she’d hear him and immediately change her mind. He was so elated with the change in his fortune, that he hugged both Remus and Sirius to his chest and professed his eternal happiness for them. It was quite nice to witness actually. 

“Doing what exactly?” He’s standing in front of the mirror, all self consciousness set aside, looking very pleased with himself. I know the look on his face. He’s about to march down to breakfast and muck up all the progress he’s made with Lily over the last couple of days with some obnoxious proclamation of love. 

“Taking the wheel, so to speak.” I pull him away from the mirror and sit him onto his bed. Remus and Sirius are smirking at us from Sirius’s bed, looking as if they were always meant to share it together. 

“I don’t need any help, Pete. Lily has succumbed to my charms.” He makes to stand back up, but I push him down again. “Hey!”

“Sit,” I say firmly. “Now, I know I’m no expert on this whole love thing, having never been in love myself, but I do know what I’ve seen. And I’ve seen a lot.”

“That’s true,” Remus says. He gestures back and forth between him and Sirius. “You saw this coming before anyone else.”

“I did,” I say and smile at the two of them. 

“But you’ve been telling me for years that me and Lily were never going to happen,” James says.

“No, what I’ve actually said is that you and Lily were never going to happen if you continue to behave like an arrogant prick.” Remus and Sirius laugh from their bed.

“That’s true, he has said that,” Sirius agrees and James flips him the V. Sirius winks in return. Things are starting to feel normal again around here.

“And over the last few days, though you’ve absolutely continued to be a prick to the rest of us, you’ve been noticeably softer around Lily.”

“I Am Not Soft!!!”

“You are, actually,” I say, and Remus and Sirius hum their agreement. “And it’s that softness that has caused Lily to warm to you. She’s not interested in cocksure James…”

“Cocksure,” Sirius and Remus snicker.

“Shut up you two.” I turn and point a finger at them and they continue to laugh into each others shoulders. “As I was saying, Lily isn’t into your arrogant facade. She’s smarter than that. She’s interested in the real you. The you that has actual feelings and emotions and can manage vulnerability.”

“I’m not vulnerable Pete,” James says with a roll of his eyes. Though the way his cheeks turn pink only proves my point for me.

“You are,” I say and pause to let it sink in. “And that’s what Lily likes about you.”

“That and how fit I look in my kit.” 

I throw my hands up in the air and sit on my own bed. “You’re hopeless. You know that right?”

_____ 

**Remus - Saturday October 30th, 1976**

** _“I’m with you, you know that.” _ **I grab onto Sirius’s hand as I say it. I’m with him, wholeheartedly. Not that I ever had a choice, he’s always had my heart. 

“I know. Thank you,” he says softly. His fingers grip a bit tighter around mine. 

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?”

“I’m sure.” He turns to face me and presses his lips against mine. “I’d rather tell him myself than have him find out through someone else.”

“Ok,” I say and kiss him again. It’s really only been less than two weeks since all of this started, but it honestly feels as if Sirius and I have always been together. Maybe we have, it just took us awhile to realize it.

The door behind us opens and we turn to see Regulus walk through. I attempt to let go of Sirius’s hand, but he grips it tighter. Regulus closes the door behind him, his eyes staring at our intertwined fingers.

“So the rumours are true then?” Regulus says more than asks. 

Sirius nods. There goes getting ahead of this, I think. 

“And you wanted to tell me yourself?” Regulus smiles a bit sadly at Sirius.

“I was hoping to,” Sirius says, his fingers in a near crushing grip within my own.

“I’m not that surprised actually. It all sort of makes sense now.”

“You’re not mad?” I can feel the tension begin to drain away from Sirius. He’s been terrified of what Regulus’s reaction was going to be. And to be honest, I’m more than a little bit surprised that it’s going so well.

“I’m not mad. I’m not anything Sirius. It’s your life. Love who you want to love. But you better pray to Merlin and Morgana and even Godric Fucking Gryffindor, that mum and dad never find out.” He gives Sirius a knowing and almost sympathetic look.

“Well, it’s not as if their opinion really matters anymore.” Sirius’s voice is heavy. It makes me want to pull him into me, to wrap my arms around him and keep him safe from his family. From his former life.

“No, I guess it doesn’t,” Regulus says. He gives the two of us another look over and offers us something that resembles a smile. “I’ll see you around Sirius.”

“See you Regulus.” Together we watch him leave. When the door closes behind him, Sirius turns and wraps his arms around my waist. 

“I love you,” I tell him, my arms around his shoulders, my lips against his cheek.

“I love you too.”

_____  


**Sirius - Sunday October 31st, 1976**

** _“Scared, me?” _ **James gestures at himself in mock incredulity. “I’m terrified actually.”

“Good. Use that,” I say. “It’ll remind Lily that you’re human.”

“Right.” James shakes his head. “Human. Got it. Be vulnerable, not arrogant. Be kind, not condescending. Be scared.”

“So in other words, act natural.” I swat the back of his head. It’s an affectionate swat, I never actually want to hurt him when I do it. None of us do.

“What about you?” he asks, his hand moving to scratch behind his ear.

“What about me?”

“Are you scared? With Remus?”

I smile a bit dopely at the mention of his name. “No,” I say. “Being with Remus, is the only thing I’ve never been scared about.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments and kudos are always appreciated. You can also come find me on tumblr @kattlupin 💛


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